"Up to 4 books of safety (non-strike anywhere) matches are permitted as carry-on items, but all matches are prohibited in checked baggage"-from the TSA list of prohibited items.
Who really cares if the president said "shit". He would have caught less hell by getting a blow job from an intern and perjuring himself on national television.
Next time a solicitor comes knocking on your door (Jehovah's witness, magazine seller, ect...) answer the door naked holding a beer and a gun. They won't bother you again.
Why is there neither a world-wide shoot a lawyer, or world-wide shot a mime day? Think how much better the world would be.
I want an evil nemesis (or a good one, I'm not picky).
Buy plastic Easter eggs, some white mice, and a sledge hammer at Wal-mart. Look at the expression on the cashier's face.
Mmmmm... Tacos
Why do trailer parks, and plastic flamingos attract tornados?
Why does certain classical music pieces remind me of a cartoon cat chasing a mouse, or a cartoon rabbit giving a man a haircut?
This guy tied missile shaped balloons to his truck and rode down a major interstate doing 90 MPH. Wonder how many cops stopped him, and how many yelled at him to go faster?
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin
4 comments:
"answer the door naked holding a beer and a gun"
I was about to go the beach one day and the door bell rang. It was a couple of sweet little old ladies with thick accents trying to seel me some religious magazines. I decided to open the door in my bikini. They never came back! :D
pictures? *grin*
Mate...this whole post made me laugh out loud...Wher do you get thoise balloons. ...that would look great!
Not sure Scorpy, I want some myslef.
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