Passing in the night

The cool glass presses against my back as I wait. The cab dropped me off into the hot languid night too early, now just to wait. The throngs of people rush by me, I scan the crowd. A face stands out, our eyes meet. The distance between us closes, surprise and curiosity meet my steady gaze. Light banter is exchanged, queries are answered, and farewells are said. Our ways part and again I wait.

Why fight?

Why fight? A better question would be "Why live?".

Not talking about fisticuffs, talking about life in general.

It's not about winning or losing, it's about having tried. It's about standing up for what you want and those you care about. It's about not choosing the easy path. It's about passion, pain, joy, and in the end it's about life.

If you're not willing to fight, are you alive?

Can't sleep...

I lay in bed, the night beckoning me with the promise of repose. My mind races with the thoughts of the day, the harsh red LED of my clock displays 10:30. I close my eyes and try to quell the flow of thoughts to no avail. Words and images flash across the back of my eyelids. I toss and turn trying to find a comfortable position, with a sigh I get up and have a drink of water.
Returning to the my bed, scarlet numbers glare at me 02:00. I try again to slumber, almost immediately my mind is flooded. Guess there is no choice, time to try the place. Under the accusing 04:00 I create the flame in my mind, and let it all burn away. With all the thoughts gone and the flame extinguished I start to fade. The world becomes soft and begins to s.l..i...p a...w.a....y....


CRACK!!!


The world snaps into sharp focus, every sense dials in at the sudden sound. Muscles tense and prepare to move. The glue holding one of my mounted photos to the wall has let go allowing a Hong Kong Skyscraper to crash into my floor. 04:15 dances before me mockingly. The rest of the night passes in reverie. Never fully asleep and not quite awake, the false sleep of wakefulness.
The blaring crescendo of my alarm clock is no surprise, 0600 beams at me triumphant. It's gonna be a long Monday.

Trust

Some things came to light this weekend, they dealt directly with a situation that has caused me much confusion and more than a little bit of hurt. Managed to reopen some things I thought I was over. Seems that a lot could have been avoided if outside parties had simply either kept their advise to themselves, or said you two need to talk and come to an understanding. Some of the people I trusted gave advise one way, and then told me the opposite or played dumb when dealing with me. This actually hits harder than the actual situation.
When I call someone a friend, that is someone I put my trust into. I know many people but only consider a very few friends, these are the people I love like brothers and sisters. That none of the folks involved played me straight on this, kinda leave me floored. Things done with "the best intentions" often fall short of the mark.

The place

I stand knees slightly inward, head and shoulders slightly back, arms raised in front of me, hands unclenched and fingers at my target. My mind is teaming with unnecessary thoughts, so I build a fire.
All anger goes into it, all fear, all longing, all sadness, all happiness, all emotions burn away. Next comes the issues of the day, all the issues from work, her eyes, it all burns away. Everything I am burns away, leaving nothing but the fire and with out fuel it goes out. This is the place.
Senses expand and the world slows down, the guys across the gym play basketball in slow motion. Finally I move, the heavy bag jerks from the impacts. Every bead of sweat is felt, the heart races to keep up with the demand. I hear the hushed whispers as the basket ball players stop to watch. The cycle continues, formlessness is given form, every breath is measured, every movement precise, nothing is wasted.
Finally it ends, and I leave the place. The world rushes in and fills the void. I feel everything again, but it doesn't seem as important. My body aches, and all I can do is smile. It's been a long time since I came here, and I have missed it.

Saying Hello....

I received the call this morning, I've been waiting on it the last couple days. Waking from a dead sleep, I look at the phone and grin.

7.4 pounds 19 inches long, little round face and already some dark hair.

Welcome to the world Abigail Elizabeth, you have an uncle who loves you.

Saying goodbye....

Said goodbye to a friend last night. She is leaving the country to pursue a better life. Quite a bittersweet evening, laughs and smiles that never quite reach the eyes. Promises to visit that ring hollow were exchanged. After all is said and done farewell is said and the lingering emptiness is left.

Pirate time!!

I think in their hearts everyone, no matter how prim and proper, dreams of being a pirate.

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats. -Henry Louis Mencken

Even pirates, before they attack another ship, hoist a black flag. -Bela Kiraly

Life's pretty good, and why wouldn't it be? I'm a pirate, after all. -Johnny Depp

There is more treasure in books than in all the pirate's loot on Treasure Island and at the bottom of the Spanish Main... and best of all, you can enjoy these riches every day of your life. -Walt Disney (not a true pirate quote, but one I like none the less)

The average man will bristle if you say his father was dishonest, but he will brag a little if he discovers that his great-grandfather was a pirate. -Bern Williams

Where there is a sea there are pirates. -Greek proverb

Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates. -Mark Twain

It is when pirates count their booty that they become mere thieves. -William Bolitho



Quotes from Thinkexist.com

New neice on the way!!!

Got the message from my sister that in the next couple days I'm gonna have a new neice!! So I am a quite anxious at the moment.

Deja Vu

I've had it pretty much all my life. See and do things in a dream, then later down the road have these things happen. It happens randomly, and most of the time I don't remember the dream till I'm in the situation. Saturday this happened again, it was almost like the night was scripted. A very odd feeling. How come this can never happen with Lotto numbers?